Creating Margin

Our children are now thirteen and eleven, but there was a season when all three of them were less than three years old.  Every day our lives felt like a sprint that never ended. I was waking up to feed the twins several times a night. Between being sleep deprived and work deadlines there was no space left for me and for us as a couple. That’s when I was introduced to the concept of margin.

What “Creating Margin” Really Means

Margin is the breathing room between your limits and your load. It’s the space you deliberately build into your life so that when something goes wrong, you don’t tip over. Think of any book that you have ever read. It never has text from top to bottom and left to right. There is space that is left on the edges that is called margin. It makes the book easier to read, less overwhelming, and, in general, looks better. For a working mother, creating margin might look like:

• Having 10 minutes of quiet time before your household wakes up.
• Saying no to that extra committee role.
• Keeping a bit of money away so an  emergency doesn’t break you.
• Not being afraid to miss a few social events so you can find yourself.

Creating margin is not laziness, but it’s how busy professionals thrive.

Why Margin Matters So Much For Working Mothers

Most working mums I know don’t just have full plates, the plates are spilling over. Careers and motherhood are only part of the story. Many  are also helping with extended family responsibilities, managing through unreliable systems such as load-shedding, gridlocked traffic, and often running a side hustle to supplement the income from their main jobs.

In that mix, margin is the difference between running on fumes and being able to breathe. It’s what allows you to show up with patience for your family, clarity at work, and enough energy left for yourself. Without margin, you live stretched thin.

Five Strategies to Create Margin in Everyday Life

1. Guard the Start of Your Day. Find a morning routine that works for you. Do not feel pressure to be a member of the 5 AM Club.  If you have to wake up several times a night to feed babies, to change diapers etc, a 5 am waking time might not work for you. Whatever time you wake up, you can use the early morning minutes for prayer or stretching. It changes how you face the day.

2. Leave Empty Slots in Your Week. Not every evening needs to be booked. Not every weekend has to be packed with errands or social events. Protect at least one slot where nothing is planned. It becomes your cushion  for rest, for catching up, or for the unexpected.

3. Simplify What You Can. This will look different for each of us. I have a  friend who does all her meal prep on Sunday afternoon. It reduces decision fatigue on what to cook  during the week. Another way is to rotate a handful of easy family meals  during the week and going all out over the weekend when you have more time to prepare more elaborate meals. Keep a capsule wardrobe of mix-and-match outfits that work for the office. Small changes free up big amounts of energy.

4. Create Financial Breathing Room. A small emergency fund matters. Sometimes, it’s last-minute school contributions, a fridge that suddenly stops working, and that buffer keeps you calm. Margin in finances is just as important as margin in time. Dave Ramsey recommends starting with $1000 or whatever the equivalent in your currency. You can gradually work your way to three to six months’ worth of expenses. You can also watch a video on Dave Ramsey’s The 7 Baby Steps here.

5. Practice the Gentle “No”. This one takes practice, but it’s freeing. A polite, firm no is not rude. Saying “I can’t take this on right now” leaves you with the capacity to say “yes” to what really matters: your health, your children, your peace of mind.

Creating margin doesn’t mean doing less it means doing what matters most, with enough space to breathe.

I often think about the story of Mary and Martha in Luke 10 vs 38 – 42. Martha was busy in the kitchen, running around, making sure everything was perfect. I see myself in her, fussing over the details, trying to keep everything together. But Jesus gently reminded her that Mary, who chose to sit and listen, had chosen what was better.

Sometimes, creating margin is choosing to sit down  even when there are unticked things on the to do list. It’s choosing to be present for what is important instead of squeezing in one more thing. It’s choosing to breathe instead of rushing to the next thing.

Our children won’t remember if every school lunch was gourmet or if the house was spotless every Saturday. But they will remember that we were there, calm, and present.

So today, I am choosing to be a little more like Mary  to create margin, to pause, and to be fully present. And I hope you will give yourself permission to do the same.

Gratitude: This week, I am grateful for opportunities and open doors. It’s amazing how God ensures the right doors open for us at the right time.

On my playlist, I am still listening to No Idols from Mmuso Worship featuring Yanga Sobetwa and Brenden Praise.

Gratefully